hope U enjoy:
ein wenig zen ...

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I
may not follow. Do not walk beside me, either; just leave me the heck alone.

2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky

3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your
neighbour's newspaper, that's the time to do it. [sic]

5. Don't be irreplaceable; if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

6. No one is listening until you make a mistake.

7. Always remember you're unique, like everybody else.

8. Never test the depth of water with both feet.

9. It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning
to others.

10. It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities
without your help.

11. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car

12. Before you critisize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.
That way, when you critisize them, you're a mile away and you have their

13. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

14. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish,
and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

15. If you lend someone $ 20, and never see that person again, it was very
probably worth it.

16. Don't squat with your spurs on.

17. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

18. If you drink, don't park; accidents cause people.

19. Some days you are the bug; some days you are the windshield.

20. Don't worry, it only seems so wired the first time.

21. Good judgement comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from
bad judgement.

22. The quickest way to double your money ist to fold it in half and put it
back into your pocket.

23. Timing has an awful lot to do with the outcome of a raindance.

24. A closed mouth gathers no feet.

25. Duct tape is like the force; it has a light side and a dark side, and it
holds the universe together.

26. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

27. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your mouth is moving.

28. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

29. Never miss a good chance to shut up.